Are You A Victim Or A Survivor?

Are You A Victim or A Survivor?

As I sit and reflect on a recent morning meditation, I am being reminded by my spirit helpers that I have once again survived Mercury Retrograde.  Of course, the beauty of that transit is that it causes one to remember past events and people from our past.  My guides want me to write about being a victim or a survivor to you readers.  Okay, I will be happy to share my thoughts.

My experience with counseling clients has brought a lot of dynamic information as to the human psyche.   What makes us tick?  What are our motivations for what we think, say and do?

Let’s begin by going back to your childhood.  What was your relationship with your parents like?  Examine your relationship with your friends, teachers, neighbors.  Was your home environment warm and loving or was there arguing and fights?  Did you experience bullying at school?

Here is a fact.  Everything you have ever heard, seen, felt, tasted, spoken are in your Akashic records; or your soul book.  The key to all these experiences is how you process them.

I will give you an example of a family unit.  The Brown family has a Father, Mother, and two children, male and female.  Father Brown has had a hard life; growing up in a love repressed family.  Mr. Brown is a fireman. Mrs. Brown is a housewife.  Jilly Brown, age 10, is an ‘A’ student and plays the piano.  Joey Brown is 16 with poor grades and has friends who deal drugs. They are a middle class family, nice home, two cars, and are friendly and well liked by their neighbors.  They have taught their children good morals, values and principles. 

Jilly wants to go to college and work with disabled children. She is helpful at home, singing a song or joking with family and friends.  She respects and loves her parents and feels her Father works too hard.  But she picks up the slack for the family unit.  Joey has no goals, seems to slide through everyday life.  Joey perceives his Father’s long hours away from home as not being a good provider. He has resentment toward his Dad because of this.

Fast forward in time.  Jilly is now 25 and has realized her career dream as a therapist.  She is still loving, caring and perceives her upbringing as fruitful; realizing her parents instilled good values and made sacrifices for her.  She harbors no resentment toward her Dad being absent from the home for long periods of time.

Joey is now 31 years old.  He still lives at home with his parents.  He has worked on and off since 21, but can’t seem to hold a job.  His Father is retired and works odd job in the neighborhood.  Joey can’t understand why his Mother loves his Father.  His resentment toward his Father has festered and grown all these years and perceives that his Father neglected his family because of his job as a fireman. 

Joey also has a drinking problem; he drinks to try to forget how miserable his life is.  He still has no goals, no focus on where his life is going.  He feels like a victim of circumstances.  Joey blames his upbringing on why his life is so sour. He kept making excuses for his sad life & blamed other people, the economy, etc.

How did the brother and sister from the same family come to such opposite results?   It is called attitude.  If Joey would have re-examined  perception of his Father’s absence is a more positive way and perhaps learned that there was a valid reason for his Father’s absence from the home, he could have taken the high road; as his sister did.  Joey chose to be the victim.  Jilly is the survivor.

When you perceive yourself as a victim, it’s basically the same as giving your power away.  It is always your choice as to how you perceive your life experiences.  And yours alone.

“Awaken Your Spiritual Consciousness!”

Dr. Rachel S. Kohler, LLC

www.spiritualconsultations.com

Office 843-818-2216